No Regrets
by gabisamore
Summary: Romeo makes the worse mistake of his life and he can't seem to be able to live with the consequences, but is ending it all really the answer? My first H&A fic, I hope you like it! And if you don't...well phooey.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I don't even know why the heck I'm posting this, if anything maybe to make up for the fact that my new H2O story isn't quite ready to be posted, and I know that several of the readers of H2O are also fans of Home & Away. Idk if I'm even going to continue this, it's kind of a strange plot, pulling more of the blame of the break-up of Romeo and Indi on Romeo, with an…interesting twist we might say. I really have nothing planned, just a vague idea, but if enough people like this I might attempt to make something out of it. Okay, I'm going to shut up now and let you read this little snippet. Enjoy! :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Home & Away.**

PROLOGUE

I couldn't take it anymore. I saw my life flash before my eyes and everything I saw disgusted me. I couldn't do this to her, to them. It was better this way.

I lifted the gun to my forehead, which was dripping with beads of sweat. I took a deep breath and clenched my jaw in anticipation of the pain that I knew was soon to follow. I shook my head silently; I mustn't waste anymore time. With that resolve in my mind I pulled the trigger, hoping to end all my troubles, sorrows, and pains.

I felt a sharp searing pain in my head that brought me to my knees, but I refused to let myself make a sound. I heard someone cry out from downstairs, but it didn't matter. The door was locked; they wouldn't reach me until it was too late. She would find someone better, so much better. She deserved better; she deserved the best. Those were my last thoughts before I sunk into complete and utter darkness, collapsing in a heap on the floor.

The peace and calmness was overwhelming. For the first time in weeks, I didn't hate myself. I had done what I needed to do; there was no turning back, and for the first time in my life I had no regrets.

* * *

"Dad, what was that?" Indi half-screamed, panicking.

"It sounded like a gun," Sid said slowly.

"Romeo," they both said simultaneously.

"Oh my god, ROMEO!" Indi shrieked, dashing in the direction of the bedroom. She slammed into the door, twisting the knob in vain.

"It's locked!" she sobbed. "Dad, do something! Romeo!"

"Take it easy Indi," Sid said calmingly, his emergency training taking over. He turned towards the door.

"Romeo, can you hear me?" he called.

No answer. Indi moaned and buried her head in her hands. Just then Dex walked in the front door.

"Hello my _familia_, how goes things on..." his voice trailed off when he saw Indi crying and his dad's serious face.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"Romeo is locked in the bedroom and we think he might have attempted suicide. Dex, I need your help; we're going to have to jar the door loose."

"Oh my gosh, are you serious?" Dex asked incredulously, coming over by his father.

"Yes, I'm serious, now on three we hit the door."

Dex nodded, still looking bewildered, and placed his shoulder up against the bedroom door along with Sid's.

"Okay, one, two, three!" And with that Sid and Dex threw all their strength at the door, jarring it, but not dislodging it.

Indi was frantic. "Dad, hurry, he could be dead by now!" she screamed.

"One more time Dex, I think that'll do it," Sid said, "and give it all you got this time!" They rammed into the door once again, and this time it shuddered and collapsed. Sid stepped through the wreckage with Indi and Dex close at his heels.

"Oh boy," he sighed as he viewed the situation. Indi pushed her way passed.

"Oh my god, Romeo," she cried, kneeling by her husband, who was collapsed on the floor, blood pouring out of his temple.

"Dex, call an ambulance, now," Sid ordered, taking charge. Dex was out the door in a second. Sid turned back to his daughter and knelt on the ground by his unconscious son-in-law.

"Dad," Indi gasped, on the verge of hysteria with tears rolling down her cheeks, "Is he going to be okay? Please tell me he's going to be okay."

Sid sighed. "I don't know."

"I don't know."

**A/N: Soooo? What did you think? Horrible? Pathetic? Terrible? Awful? Not bad? Horrendous? Just plain YUCK? I don't know what to think of it myself and I'm fighting a battle with myself whether or not it was a good idea to post this. You can help me feel A LOT better if you review. Just let me know what you thought about this; even if you hated it. I don't mind constructive criticism; it can be extremely helpful. On the other hand, if you actually like it, it would totally make my day if you were to tell me. Okay, I'm done chattering. Thank you so much for reading! :)**

**Ella:)**


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Wow, I can't believe that people actually like this! I'm so happy! Okay, this is going back in time a bit, before the events of the previous chapter, just to give some background. Enjoy! :)

**Disclaimer: I do not own Home & Away.**

CHAPTER 2

Indi's POV:

I was nervous. I don't know how else to put it. Romeo and I had taken a break and our marriage was more than a bit shaky, but how do you tell your husband that you slept with someone else when he was gone? Or even worse, how do you tell him that you're pregnant and that it's not his? I had a doctor's appointment a week ago and it was confirmed. I was three weeks along, and I hadn't slept with Romeo for over a month. It was a stupid mistake, I see that now, but I was so angry that night. I just wanted revenge, on exactly what I don't know. And Logan wasn't exactly trying to discourage me. Logan. How could I have been so blind? He was gone. I told him about the baby, or rather he found out. I haven't seen him since. I loved Romeo, I always would love Romeo, but after what I've done, I'm afraid that he'll never be able to love me again. My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps on the porch where I was sitting. I looked up and saw Romeo, right on time and looking insanely handsome as always. I really just wanted to get up and throw my arms around him and never let go, but I restrained myself. This wasn't a movie and he wasn't going to forget just like that.

"Hey," he said by way of greeting.

"Hey," I reply, smiling weakly. He sat down beside me at the table, a look of concern on his face.

"Are you okay? You look strange, like you're scared." He said slowly. He always could see right through me. I've never been able to hide anything from him before; why should now have been any different? I would have to tell him at some point and it might as well be now, so I took a deep breath and faced him, knowing what I had to do, but completely terrified to do it.

* * *

Romeo's POV:

"I can't believe you would do this!" I shouted, rising from my seat. "I knew things were bad, but really?" I was beyond mad; I was furious. I wanted to hit something, hurt someone, and it was taking the willpower I possessed to keep myself in check. Indi had betrayed me, but I would never lay a hand on her, or any other woman for that matter. I'd seen first hand all the pain abuse causes and no way was I going down that road.

Indi was crying. "Romeo I'm so sorry," she sobbed. "I'm just so sorry."

Under most circumstances that would have been enough to make me forgive and forget, but this was too much. I've sacrificed everything for this marriage, for Indi. I've tried so hard to make things work; I can't forgive this. I can't. I turned and began to leave.

"Romeo, you can't do this! I can't do this alone!"

"You should have thought of that before you slept with Logan." I retorted angrily.

"But Romeo, you don't understand. I'm – "

"But nothing," I cut her off coldly. I turned on my heel and stormed inside the house and into our bedroom, correction, Indi's bedroom. It sure as hell wasn't mine anymore.

"What are you doing?" She asked, following me from behind.

"Packing my stuff, to make room for Logan," I spat. Most of my things were already at the trailer park, so I didn't really have much to take. The bag I had grabbed hastily was only half-full when I finished.

"Romeo, please, just let me explain," Indi pleaded, placing her hand on my shoulder. "Just let me finish. I – I love you."" I shook her hand off roughly and looked at her.

"After all that's happened do you honestly expect me to believe that?" I said. She didn't answer. I just shook my head incredulously and stalked out the door.

"There's nothing to explain; this is over, completely and utterly over. I never want to see you again, and you'd better hope that I don't see Logan again either." I shouted. I strode out to my car and climbed in, slamming the door behind me. I could hear Indi sobbing, but I was so angry that I didn't even care.

My head was spinning as I drove and I knew that I needed to cool off before I went any further, so after a few minutes I pulled over and flicked on my emergency lights. I shook my head angrily before slamming my fist against the steering wheel. Everything I had, my wife, my future, had just gone up in smoke before my eyes, and I couldn't help but blame myself. If I had been home instead of on the circuit, Logan would never have gotten more than a mile near my wife, MY wife, Indi, the most beautiful girl in the world. She always was and always would be. I should have been more sensitive, more open to her feelings. Maybe then I wouldn't have lost her. But it was too late. Too late.

Indi's POV:

I stood frozen as Romeo drove away. I hadn't even told him everything; he hadn't let me. He didn't know I was pregnant, and he didn't know that Logan was history. All he knew was that I had betrayed his trust, and apparently that was enough. I wasn't angry, I didn't blame him for the way he felt, I had reacted the same way when he had slept with Ruby. But that was different, we had only been dating and it was a simple misunderstanding. This…I knew it had been wrong, I knew I should have said no, but I didn't and I couldn't put the blame on my situation on anybody but myself. I walked stiffly back into the house and into my room. It seemed so empty without Romeo's aftershave and cologne sitting on the bureau, his board shorts draped over a chair and his wet beach towels on the bed; I used to yell at him for that. I smiled slightly at the memory.

"_Romeo!" I yelled, starring at the mess that was our bedroom._

"_Yeah, what's up?" he said innocently, coming in to stand behind me._

_I glared at him. "What's up? Seriously Romeo, look at this room, it looks like a pigsty! Honestly, how can you make so much mess?" I snapped indignantly. _

_He looked around the room. "What mess?" he asked, feigning ignorance._

"_Romeo!" I growled. He grinned and pulled me into his arms, resting his chin on my shoulders. _

"_Only kidding, I'm sorry babe, I'll clean it up," he kissed my forehead and I leaned into him, breathing in his salty-oceany scent._

"_If you keep going on like that you might even persuade me to help you." I mumbled. He chuckled._

"_Well in that case…" and then he spun me around so I was facing him and kissed me._

"_I love you, you know that right?" I mumbled in between kisses._

"_Of course I know that," he whispered back, beginning to kiss my neck._

"_But," I said in a normal tone of voice, "I might not if you don't CLEAN UP THIS ROOM," and with that I pulled away sharply, catching Romeo mid-kiss._

"_Hey!" He cried in disappointment, frowning. _

_I laughed and wiggled my eyebrows at him. "I'll help, and if we work fast, I might just let you, um, FINISH, what you were doing previously before we go eat lunch."_

_He grinned, "I think you've got a deal," he said. Then he picked up a pillow from our un-made bed and playfully tossed it in my direction._

_I screamed and caught it, and then used it to smack Romeo on the head._

"_Ow!" He yelped in surprise, reaching out an arm to grab me. I squealed and tried to run, but I felt his strong arms wrap around my waist and he pulled me down with him onto the bed._

"_Romeo!" I protested, "We're supposed to be cleaning!" He paid no attention and kissed me deeply. When we finally broke apart, both of us were gasping for breath._

"_Do you still want to clean now?" Romeo breathed, tickling my ear and sending shivers down my spine._

"_Shut up," I mumbled, only half-annoyed, as I snuggled into his chest. He held me close and placed his lips next to my ear._

"_I love you," he whispered softly, tenderly caressing my hair._

"_I love you too,"_

Tears filled my eyes. What had happened to us? It was like a single loose thread on a sweater. If you clip it off right away, it won't cause any problems, but if you let it keep pulling, it will slowly but surely destroy the whole sweater and all you'll be left with is a pile of useless thread. Our marriage had come completely unraveled and I was afraid that it was to late to sew it back together. The tears that I had been suppressing for the past few minutes finally broke free, and I buried my face in my pillow and sobbed.

**A/N: What did you think? I had a lot of fun with the flashback. I wanted to do at least a LITTLE Romingo romance now…but more will come, you'll just have to be patient! :) Anyway, please review! I'm so thankful that you read it, but I'd really love to know what you think! Thanks again! :)**

**Ella :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Okay, I know it's been awhile but I've been super busy. This is more of a filler chapter, but it starts getting better in the next chapter; that's where all the drama begins! :) I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Home and Away**

Romeo's POV:

I walked into the door of the caravan park, slamming it shut behind me. I threw my bag on the floor and kicked the first thing in sight, one of the dining room chairs. It clattered across the room, making more noise than I had intended, but I didn't care. My life was a wreck and I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep it all together.

"Whoa, whoa, what's going on out here?" Ruby came rushing out of the bedroom. She took one look at the chair and then at my face.

"Romeo, what's wrong?" she asked immediately, walking over to me. I shook my head, rubbing my forehead with one hand.

"Not now Rubs, please," I groaned, walking over to the couch. I sat down, but then stood back up and started pacing. As I walked by a bare wall I suddenly couldn't take it anymore. I spun around and punched the wall with all my might, leaving a large dent. A wave of pain shot through my fist and I gasped in surprise, but the painful tingling strangely enough felt good.

"Romeo! Oh my god, okay, that does it, you're telling me now!" She exclaimed, coming up behind me. She placed her hand on my shoulder but I shook it off roughly.

"Romeo, what's the matter with you?" She asked incredulously, sounding a bit hurt. Then I snapped.

"RUBY, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" I shouted, spinning around and going up the stairs to my old bedroom. I went inside and slammed the door shut. I sat down on my bed and reality began to set in. Indi had slept with someone else. I was going to kill Logan if I ever saw him again. That miserable, no-good….

I knew I had been horrible to Ruby; she had just been trying to help. I would apologize, but not until I had calmed down sufficiently. I laid back on the bed and shut my eyes. My head was killing me; it was all too much, and so fast. I stopped thinking and just lay there, I was mentally exhausted and it wasn't long before I fell into a troubled and restless sleep.

It was about and hour later when I finally woke up. I wasn't as angry as I had been before, but my head still ached. I got up slowly and dragged myself out the door and into the bathroom, looking for some aspirin. I rummaged in the medicine cabinet, but no luck. I groaned in frustration, and then finally stumbled down the stairs and into the kitchen. Ruby was sitting at the table with her laptop flipped open.

"Hey Rubs," I said nervously, "Do you know where the aspirin is?" She looked up right away.

"I think it's in the kitchen, is everything alright? She asked concerned, getting up and stepping into the next room.

"No," I moaned as I leaned against the counter, "I have a headache," A few seconds later she handed me the pills and a glass of water. I swallowed them gratefully.

"Thanks," I mumbled groggily, still half asleep.

"No problem, " she sad slowly, looking at me strangely.

"And I'm really sorry for blowing up at you earlier," I apologized, "I was just loosing it and…"

"No, it's fine," she assured me, "It's no big deal,"

I sighed, 'Yes it is, I had no right to freak out on you like that," I insisted.

She shrugged, "what's important now though, is are you okay now." I shook my head, "Not really," I said.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She said cautiously.

"Kind of," I said, maybe talking would help me sort out my feelings. Ruby sat down on the couch and I followed.

"Does this have anything to do with Indi?' She said. I glanced at her.

"Yeah but how did you know?" I asked in surprise.

"Lucky guess,' She smiled half-heartedly. "Now, tell me what's going on."

"Indi slept with Logan," I blurted out. "I said that I never wanted to see her again and I just left."

She stared at me, her mouth hanging open. "Oh gosh are you serious?" she gasped. "Oh Romeo I'm so sorry." She said, rubbing my arm comfortingly. I smiled sarcastically.

"You know, I thought we could fix things." I choked. "We could have, but she…I…" I didn't let myself finish. I didn't want too.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. Maybe you can still work things out." I shook my head.

"I don't think so. Even if I could forgive her, I don't think she ever could forgive me for the things I said." I clenched my fists. "I was just so angry, at Logan mostly, but at Indi too, I mean, I gave up everything for her, I gave up school, my friends, my family almost, sometimes even surfing just to make her happy." I sighed. "And then what do I get? The minute I turn my back she sleeps with the first guy that comes along."

Ruby nodded understandingly. "Romeo, I know your upset, but you need to remember that everyone makes mistakes. None of us are perfect, not Indi, and not you either."

I nodded. "I know, it's just that I just feel so hurt. If she was really feeling so upset about me and you, then why didn't she just try and talk to me? I would have listened – ""

" –When you were home," Ruby cut in. "Romeo, your marriage was in a crucial spot, and maybe it wasn't the best idea ever to go off somewhere, leaving your wife behind to wait for you. Maybe later on it would have worked fine, but I think now was too soon."

I groaned. "I know, Ruby, god, I know. I've been screaming at myself ever since I found out. It really is my fault, and it wasn't fair for me to take it out on Indi."

"No, Romeo, I didn't mean that at all. It's NOT completely your fault; there are certainly other ways that Indi could have taken out her frustration that weren't as drastic as sleeping with someone else. The point isn't whose fault it was, the point is, how are you going to fix it?"

"I don't think I can." I said quietly. "It's too late now. She found someone else, and even when she said that she still loved me, I said I didn't believe her…and…then I just left and I don't think she's going to want me back. I wouldn't if I was her."

Ruby didn't say anything.

"I just wanted everything to be perfect for us. We loved each other. We got married, but I don't think either of us realized how much responsibility comes with marriage. We jumped in too fast and got in over our heads."

"I know things seem hopeless right now, and maybe you're right about being in over your head," Ruby began. "But Romeo, promise me something."

"What?" I whispered.

"Don't ever give up hope of making it to the surface." She said. "If you and Indi were meant to be together, it'll all work out in the end. I can promise you that."

I smiled half-heartedly. "Thanks Rubes," I said, turning to face her. "I needed that."

She smiled, "Anytime."

I stood up and walked into the kitchen to refill my water glass. I didn't see the longing look in Ruby's eyes as they followed me across the room. If I had, I would have recognized it, because it was the same look that settled in mine whenever thoughts of Indi came into my mind. But I didn't see; if I had, maybe I could have avoided all the trouble that was to come.

* * *

Indi's POV:

_(Three days later)_

I was in our living room, studying for my macroeconomics test that's tomorrow. Honestly, I would be grateful to do ANYTHING just to get my mind of off Romeo. It's been three days since he left and I hadn't spoken or even seen him in all that time. I got up to make myself a tea when my phone rang. I jumped and ran to my purse, grabbing the phone and switching it on. My face fell when I saw that it wasn't Romeo, but the doctor's office. I felt like just pressing the ignore button, but I knew that it could be important, so I picked up.

'Hello?"

"Hello, may I please speak to Indigo Walker-Smith?"

"Speaking," I said slowly, sitting down.

"Mrs. Smith, we have a small change to be made in the results from your ultrasound on the 6th"

My heart skipped a beat, "what kind of a change?" I said nervously.

"It's just that we believe that you are further along than we first though, you're over six weeks definitely, it's just that the baby is a bit smaller than normal at this stage, but there seems to be nothing seriously wrong. We'd like you to come in for another check-up this week if possible."

I couldn't believe it. Six weeks. Six weeks ago Romeo had still been home. I'd only been with Logan for a little over three weeks. The baby wasn't Logan's; it was Romeo's. My thoughts were interrupted by the lady on the other side of the phone.

"Mrs. Smith, is tomorrow afternoon at 4 alright? It should be a fairly short appointment."

I shook my head and brought myself back to reality. "Yes, that's fine, I'll be there, but please, are you sure about this? Am I really more than six weeks?"

"Definitely, there's no mistake this time." Was the beautiful reply I heard.

"Thank you so much" I said shakily, "At four tomorrow, right?"

"Yes, that's correct, and you're welcome Mrs. Smith. Congratulations, I'm sure you and your husband must be very happy."

I felt my throat tighten at the word "husband". "Yes we are," I said shortly, "thanks again."

I hung up the phone and dropped it on the table. The baby was Romeo's. I was having a baby with Romeo. Then a thought struck me.

Romeo didn't know that I was pregnant. He had walked out because he knew I'd slept with Logan. It wouldn't make any difference if the baby were his or not. He obviously didn't care. Why should this change anything? It didn't, and I was still back to square one, no husband and a baby, but at least I felt a little better about the situation. I made up my mind that Romeo would never find out. He would see me with a baby and would think that it was Logan's; he had no reason to suspect otherwise, and it's not like he was going to count the weeks. He left me; he didn't deserve to know about his child. I didn't need him; I would be fine on my own. I stood up and went to put the kettle on the stove, I had plenty of studying to do and baby or no baby I still had a test in the morning.

I studied for another hour and then I couldn't take it anymore. I would probably fail the test, but at this point, I didn't really care anymore. I was stacking my textbooks when Sasha came through the door, followed by dad.

"Hey, Indi how are you feeling,' he asked. He knew I was pregnant, but he, like everybody else, thought it was Logan's baby.

"Just leave me alone!" I snapped, stalking into my room and slamming the door behind me.

I sat down on my bed and tears filled my eyes. "Stupid hormones,' I snapped to nobody in particular, swiping angrily at my eyes. There was a knock at my door.

"Go away!" I called, not wanting anybody to see me like this.

"To bad," came the reply, and before I could say anything else, Sasha barged into the room.

"Hey, can I borrow your – " She stopped suddenly and stepped a little closer.

'Wait, are you crying?" She asked curiously.

I shook my head vigorously, "No, of course, not, why would I be crying?" I got up and pretended to be busy putting away my textbooks.

"Indi, seriously? You were crying, and don't even try to convince me otherwise."

I was silent.

Sasha sighed, "You realize that you can tell me, right? It's about Romeo isn't it?"

I nodded, afraid that I would break down if I spoke.

She came over to me, "What did he do?' She asked softly. I shook my head.

'It's not what he did, well I guess it technically is, but he doesn't know he did it, I just found out, but I don't want to tell him and I…" my voice trailed off and I started sobbing. Sasha held out her arms to me and I gratefully accepted her hug. I pulled myself together after a few seconds and she looked at me seriously.

"Indi, what's going on?" She asked concerned.

I sniffed, "Sash, the baby is Romeo's, not Logan's." I whispered. She didn't say anything.

"You mean…ROMEO is the father?" I nodded. She looked surprised.

'"But, isn't that a good thing? I mean, he won't be mad at you if he knows that the baby is his, right?" I didn't answer. She gasped.

"Indi, does he know about the baby AT ALL?" She asked quickly.

I shook my head. "He left because he was angry that I had slept with someone else. I never got a chance to tell him about the baby."

"But you are going to tell him now, right?" She said expectantly.

I shook my head again. "It won't make a difference; he didn't know when he left me and I don't want him back because of guilt. If he comes back, it needs to be because he loves me."

"Indi, I think you should tell him, maybe – "

I cut her off, "No, I'm not telling him, and neither are you." I said sternly. "Promise me."

She was silent.

"Sasha…" I said warningly, "Please, I need you to do this for me. You can't tell anyone; not dad, not Dex, and especially not Romeo." She looked at me and nodded reluctantly.

"I promise."

**A/N: What did you think? So Romeo's gonna be a daddy! Awww! Unfortunately, he doesn't know it and if Indi has her way, he never will. There will be plenty of Romeo/Ruby friends in this story, but no romance, or at least I don't think so. But then again, you never know….**

**Anyway, thanks for reading! :)**

**Ella :) **


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